"I am guiding you in the way of wisdom, and I am leading you on the right path." proverbs 4:11

Category: "Prayer"

not consumed

Written by:admin
Published on December 16th, 2013 @ 10:23:00 pm , using 550 words, 728 views

so plowing forth and letting God use the words even tho the blog looks ugly now and the text might be wonky.....and i can't make links work so you'll have to go back to the post titled 'facelift' to see what i'm talking about. but i did at least figure out how to paste from MS Word without an error.....but the formatting is still a little wonky and not how i like it.  oh well.  giving myself grace! 

"How are you doing?"
"all i have is Jesus....He's the only thing that is sure/secure."
ahhh, giving a concerned look.
because we both know when a person says that, it usually means things are going rough.

and i've been thinking about that all morning.
the truth is.....Jesus as the only rock secure- is always the truth. rough times or not.
and i'd like to remember that

What i long for in growth is that the good things won't compete for my affections, and the hard things won't steal my joy.
the beautiful thing that wrought peace to my heart and brought sleep to my body earlier in the week was this. so the decision was the wrong one and the response was the wrong one, and maybe my children will go down the wrong way tho i have striven so to point them to the right way, and maybe in the work i do, i will do it all wrong and it all may just not work. regardless of my failures real and failures percieved.....

Jesus is my only hope. Jesus is sure. because of Jesus and who He is and what He does,

i can rest secure. i can cease striving because i know that He is God.

Oh that you would rend the heavens and come down,
that the mountains would tremble before You!
As when fire sets twigs ablaze and causes water to boil,
come down to make Your name known to your enemies
and cause the nations to quake before You!

For when you did awesome things that we did not expect,
You came down and the mountains trembled before You.
Since ancient times no one has heard,
no ear has perceived, no eye has seen

any God besides You,

who acts on behalf of those who wait for Him.
You come to the help of those who gladly do right,
who remember Your ways.
But when we continued to sin against them, You were angry.

How then can we be saved?

All of us have become like one who is unclean,
and all our righteous acts are like filthy rags;
we all shrivel up like a leaf, and like the wind our sins sweep us away.


You. are. our. Father.

this I call to mind
and therefore have hope:

Because of the LORD's great love
we are not consumed,
for His compassions never fail.
They are new every morning;

is Your Faithfulness.

I say to myself, 'The LORD is my portion;
therefore I will wait for Him.'
The LORD delights in those who fear Him,
who put their hope in

Those who put their hope
in God's love to not fail?
bring Him delight.

Blessed are the people whose God is the LORD
The Only One Who faithfully, faithfully gives

pardon for sin
and a peace that endureth
Thine own dear Presence
to cheer and to guide
strength for today
and bright Hope for tomorrow


Isaiah 64 (from this morning's advent reading at church); Lamentations 3; Psalm 147; 144; a Hymn



feeling homesick?

Written by:admin
Published on November 13th, 2013 @ 11:26:00 pm , using 464 words, 956 views

this has happened before, this ache.  i don?t know if homesick is the correct term.  i?ve not really any childhood home or roots that call me back.  but it?s this knawing longing to be near. it happened when my younger sister was pregnant with her first so very far away in vermont.  i was pregnant with my third in colorado and we delivered within a week of eachother.  i longed so desperately to be near her.  to share it all with her. 

but could do nothing about it.

now my youngest sister is pregnant.  and the knawing longing is there heavy today.  wishing there was some way to not be so far away.   and seeing no solution. 

and all of that is miraculous, really

for this one who worked so very hard to distance myself as far as i could from my family.  it was necessary for healing.  and the Lord met me there and rescued me unto Himself.

but they still await their rescue and know Him not. 

and they are still my dear sisters* and i do love them very much.  and i long for relationships that are closer. 

but i can do nothing about it.

even if i moved to be close to one, the other would be half-way across the country.   it seems all us girls worked hard to distance ourselves for a time.  and we all ended up spread out around this great nation of ours. 

but now, reconciliation has begun.  and the youngest moved back home near mom and dad.  but the rest of us are settled into our new locations and we have all worked to see each other from time to time for weddings and thanksgivings and Christmases.

but the way relationships can deepen with time spent together is not possible for us.

how can a family fractured and healing go much farther when we are so far apart?

but i can do nothing about it.

and how much healing can even happen when there is no bonding over the Only One who makes completely whole?

and i can do nothing about that either.

so what does one do in a time like this?  where longings are strong and there is no relief to be had of my own making?

take it to the One

the only One

who can do something about it.

and i will thank Him for whatever it is He does do.


*there is another sister-the oldest-not pictured.  there is still much work of healing needed for complete restoration of all 4 of us.  will it happen this side of heaven??  will it happen the other side of heaven??  only the Lord, the God of Israel who is Mighty to Save and who came for this very reason knows the answer to that question.  

Oh my soul

Written by:admin
Published on November 4th, 2013 @ 10:43:00 am , using 304 words, 1313 views

Psalm 103

sunset over puelblo resevoir, CO (see the heart?)

Bless the Lord, O my soul,
And all that is within me, bless His holy name.
Bless the Lord, O my soul,
And forget none of His benefits;


Who pardons all your iniquities,
Who heals all your diseases;
Who redeems your life from the pit,
Who crowns you with lovingkindness and compassion;
Who satisfies your years with good things,
So that your youth is renewed like the eagle.

The Lord performs righteous deeds
And judgments for all who are oppressed.
 He made known His ways to Moses,
His acts to the sons of Israel.

The Lord is compassionate and gracious,
Slow to anger and abounding in lovingkindness.
He will not always strive with us,
Nor will He keep His anger forever.
He has not dealt with us according to our sins,
Nor rewarded us according to our iniquities.

For as high as the heavens are above the earth,
So great is His lovingkindness toward those who fear Him.
As far as the east is from the west,
So far has He removed our transgressions from us.
Just as a father has compassion on his children,
So the Lord has compassion on those who fear Him.
For He Himself knows our frame;
He is mindful that we are but dust.


As for man, his days are like grass;
As a flower of the field, so he flourishes.
When the wind has passed over it, it is no more,
And its place acknowledges it no longer.
But the lovingkindness of the Lord is from everlasting to everlasting on those who fear Him,
And His righteousness to children?s children,
To those who keep His covenant
And remember His precepts to do them.

The Lord has established His throne in the heavens,
And His sovereignty rules over all.
Bless the Lord, you His angels,
Mighty in strength, who perform His word,
Obeying the voice of His word!

Bless the Lord, all you His hosts,
You who serve Him, doing His will.
Bless the Lord, all you works of His,
In all places of His dominion;
Bless the Lord, O my soul!

(photos of some of His benefits taken by myself except for the peacocks-those were taken by my daughter hannah.  the giraffe and the bridge are on the nile river north of uganda, the rest are from around colorado)


Written by:admin
Published on September 10th, 2013 @ 12:06:00 pm , using 256 words, 683 views

she is pulling away
     i get a call from her caseworker
            and go to check
and she?s dressed for a party
     but she opens the door for me
            and her tears flow
we sit and read psalm 139
     and i give her a hug
             but i cannot make her choice.


in another world, a dear sweet one comes to  Bible Study
     even tho she is feeling old and weak
            fighting the cancer within
and tomorrow she will learn what her options are.
               and she is hanging on - to Christ?s every Word
                               and it works
and she is comforted.


i?ve been 20 years now at this Bible Study
     this will be my 4th time through the Book of Matthew
            i started out lost.  4 years of His words, i became His
so i know that it works.


whom the Son sets free, will be free indeed.
          but it won?t work for some?  it will seem like it isn?t working for some.
               and what do i do with that?


keep going.  just keep going. 
     because He has said: 

?For as the rain and the snow come down from heaven,
And do not return there without watering the earth
And making it bear and sprout,
And furnishing seed to the sower and bread to the eater;
11 So will My word be which goes forth from My mouth;
It will not return to Me empty,
Without accomplishing what I desire,
And without succeeding in the matter for which I sent it.

oh Lord, our only hope is You. 

Only You.

Let us hold fast the confession of our hope without wavering, for He who promised is faithful.

Hebrews 10:23

Powerfully Reigning

Written by:admin
Published on July 16th, 2013 @ 04:54:00 pm , using 248 words, 1415 views

what i?ve learned so far this month:

God is powerful

  • powerful enough to intercept a cry of lonlieness with broken phones and no answer left but HIS; no one available but HIM
  • powerful enough to move an exhausted body into a world unknown and use said body in that world
  • powerful enough to keep
  • to keep one fighting against cravings for meth....and most recently heroin.  to keep day after day after excruciatingly waiting day while the system turns it?s wheels SLOWLY for admittance into rehab

and that when someone calls a rehab center while coming off of said drugs asking for help, help is not immediate.

and because the world?s help is messy and falls short and is so SLOW

the fact that God is powerful

  • is my only hope. 
  • my only source that makes it so this exhausted heart can rest
  • and so this body can leave that world and return and be present in the world i came from.

Christ. Is. Reigning. On. His. throne.

Can plunder be taken from warriors, or captives rescued from the fierce?

BUT ...... This is what the LORD says:

?Yes, captives will be taken from warriors, and plunder retrieved from the fierce;
I will contend with those who contend with you,
and your children I will save.....
Then all mankind will know that I, the LORD, am your Savior,
your Redeemer, the Mighty One of Jacob.? *

*Isaiah 49:24-26

The Mighty One, that Great Shepherd of the Sheep, the Redeemer of Old




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